Building on last week, there can be many right answers for giving. It is not my place to tell anyone how to give specifically, but I feel comfortable saying in general that we should be thinking about it and listening for how we should give.
I know there are people who have a general policy against giving to panhandlers, believing it is more effective to give to programs like food banks and shelters. That may work better than just giving money to people who ask for it.
In my observation, sometimes it seems like the neediest don't ask. Some of them may just be too beaten down to keep trying, but also I remember one man who never interacted with the flesh and blood people around him. Every morning when I saw him, it looked like he was talking to the building. I don't know what it looked like to him.
So, what you get asked may not be the most reliable indicator of how to help or what is needed. Even those times when I have been prompted, my couple of dollars is probably not a big deal, but I wonder sometimes if it is just to let them know that they are seen, and remembered.
It may not always be for them. I remember once feeling strongly to give to one man sitting down with a sign. I was too slow to react where I actually had to backtrack a little, but then another man said something, and he was frustrated with it, because he needed it more.
I don't remember exactly what he said - just the frustration - but we talked. He had just lost his housing, but was desperately holding onto his gym membership so he would still have a place to shower. I had never thought of that before, but I later learned that it is common. Some gym memberships are really cheap and rent never is. He was more frustrated that day because he was literally just coming back from a food bank and they had given him a bag full of things that he could not use.
So we swapped. I gave him some cash and he gave me the food he couldn't use. I was going to be helping with a food drive that weekend, so it was good timing. Someone else could be able to use it, especially someone with a kitchen. I didn't give him that much money; I never have that much money. Maybe it helped some, but the listening probably helped more.
He was in touch with programs, but they were not meeting his needs. I am sure it is possible to argue that he was being difficult. Some people would definitely be turned off by the anger, but if you haven't recently had to worry about being able to shower before a job interview or having a place to keep food that you don't have a can opener for, those things can be frustrating.
I know there are programs that do a really good job too. At least one food bank has different options for people who are actually on the streets versus in a home but poor. Still, there are a lot of shortcomings. Some programs discriminate against LGBT+ people; those youth are so much more likely to end up homeless that this is a real shortcoming. Some programs don't allow pets, which may be someone's only source of emotional warmth. Some hate shelters because of lice and contagious diseases. These are all things that you can easily not think about if you have a home, but not everyone does.
When you do really think about it, it's easy to get discouraged, and private giving seems woefully inadequate. It can then be logical to look at the structure. Is there a way to increase affordable housing? Is there a way to fix income inequality? Can we do more for mental illness?
Possibly as individuals we can't. We can look into uniting with other individuals, or at working with the government, or finding ways to multiply the existing resources. There are a lot of ways to go.
One time I was heading to the bakery to pick up a cake. The bus passed two homeless men and I felt I had to give something to them. I bought some extra food at the bakery and took it to them. They were walking when I passed them, and I didn't see them right away. It was easy to feel silly, but I went down another street or two and found them. It also looked like they already had some food. I think it was a weird interaction for them, but it felt like the right thing to do and I did it. Maybe they were going to have an opportunity to share, but maybe it was for me. Maybe it was a reminder that we had a lot. Even when things felt tight, we could still get a cake.
You can see how many unknowns there are. Even if I could fool myself into thinking that I can teach someone else how to give right, how would I quantify it? I can only suggest looking and listening.
Think about things with your head and keep openness in your heart. There may be miracles. There may be miracles you don't recognize, but things can happen."Be not forgetful to entertain strangers:for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." (Hebrews 13:2)
If you have concerns about being able to hear, or to understand what you are hearing and know that you are hearing it, that can be resolved through prayer, and probably through some trial and error. It's not an accident that faith, hope, and charity get grouped together -- they feed on each other and lift each other up.
I believe that we can grow together in love, and I hope that we will.
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