Things that bother me but are not the key issue

This is my third post on what I think of as the Mormon hedge fund. I know President Nelson would not love that term, but the hedge fund of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints does not really sound that much better. 

My key issue is the good being left undone, and I will write about that. This week is about the secrecy.

Let me be clear, though, that I don't think any church leaders are living luxuriously because of it. There is no greed at fault.

That matters to me, but it also matters to me that they have divided the investment funds across multiple hedge funds and through shell companies, apparently for the express purpose of concealment.

The kindest explanations I have heard for the secrecy (speculation from others; not official statements) are concerns that if members knew about the surplus that they would not feel like they needed to pay tithing, or that members would try and guide their own investments by following the church's portfolio, which could have unfortunate results.

I doubt the latter was ever officially considered, but it has some merit. I can totally see some members deciding that if a stock is good enough for the church, it is good enough for them, and then if they lost money on that they could have a crisis of faith. That is also quite possible, because the real secret to success in the stock market is having deep enough pockets that you can ride out any market downturns. It is very easy to make money when you already have it.

I was amused by the conscientious mentions in the articles that there was nothing like Starbucks or Coca-Cola in the portfolio. I remember it being a big deal when I was a teenager that the corporation of the church had Coca-Cola shares, even though cola is not specifically forbidden, and lots of faithful members drink it. (But also, lots of faithful members will judge you for drinking it, then and now.)

The tithing concern I get more, except that I have heard so many times, "The Lord doesn't need you to pay tithing; you need to pay it for you!" or something to that effect. And I believe it. Paying tithing blesses the person who pays it. I know about the fund, I hate it, and I still pay it. I think many people would keep paying it. It does not show much faith to think that they wouldn't.

Again, I don't know if that is a factor in the thinking, but it does feel like the choices are being made with less faith and more fear, or at least shame or embarrassment.

Not letting President Packer see the books when he asked? That indicates at least some understanding that it is not good.

I noticed a few things that surprised me as I was investigating. For instance, in the April conference they always read an audit report, and it confirms that everything has been done according to church policies and goals. I had never noticed before the line that "The Church follows the practices taught to its members of living within a budget, avoiding debt, and saving against a time of need."

That started in 2014, with the 2013 annual report. It wasn't there for 2012. Was that when the money started piling up? Perhaps as things recovered from the 2008 collapse? Did they look and think, this is starting to be too much money? I don't know.

I also see now that they stopped giving the statistical report (numbers of members, baptisms, church units, etc.) after 2017. It's not a secret because you can find that information on the church web site, but I am curious about the thinking now.

So here are some numbers, just for fun.

I don't object to having some reserve. I saw one estimate that the annual operating expenses for the church are $6 billion. Let's say that a two-year reserve is reasonable, so that leaves you with $88 billion to spend.

Divided between 16,565,036 members, that would be $5312 each. Obviously, that would include a lot of people who don't go anymore, and is probably not the most efficient way of doing good anyway. If you divided the $88 billion among the 30940 wards and branches, they would each have $2.85 million, which could be an amazing amount for helping the members or the local area, based on their needs. 

I am still not saying that's the best way of doing anything, but here are some other numbers, based on articles from the church newsroom.

https://newsroom.churchofjesuschrist.org/article/church-cash-commodities-donation-covid-19-april-2020

The church donated $5.5 million to COVID-19 relief. That is .0055 percent of the full $100 billion.

Since 1985, the church has given $2.2 billion in aid through its humanitarian arm. That is 2.2 percent over 35 years.

I know we can do better than that. I believe that we must do better than that.

More on that and the possible role of fear next time.

Finding out

Okay, last week I wrote about my history as a faithful tithe payer who was generous with offerings.

https://preparedspork.blogspot.com/2020/05/talking-about-money.html

I have still tried to give when I could, but over the past four years I have been making a lot less money, if I was making any at all. With the paid care-giving now (and it is less every two weeks than what I was making in one week in 2008), I did not start getting those pay checks until January.

I did make $50 in December, wrapping gifts for a family friend. I got paid just after the story broke: over $100 billion in multiple hedge funds and shell companies.

I paid my $5.00, but it felt gross: part sick and part shame. I have never felt that way about tithing before.

I have been wanting to write a letter to the Church since then, getting out all of my feelings. I have not done so in a timely matter. What I am starting to realize is how much is there, and how much processing it is taking. There was last week's post but there were two journal sessions before that, and this post is not going to finish it. (I think there will be two more.)

A letter will still happen. By the time I get there I will know exactly what I want and need to say. I see now that this preparation cannot guarantee that the letter will be short and to the point. For one thing, there will be multiple points.

Here are two points that are important...

One: I know that no one in church leadership is living high on the hog because of this. It is not a matter of personal enrichment. That does matter to me, even though there are still plenty of other problems.

Two: I still believe in the importance of tithing. I know I have been blessed for paying it. Having a regular paycheck again, I am still paying it, and paying based on the gross. I know I could pay ten percent of my income to many good causes, but this is still my church. It would not feel right for me to withhold my ten percent.

It is still very disappointing now, knowing that my contributions will be locked away in a hedge fund, doing no earthly good. Therefore, I cannot foresee a time when there will be any other contributions to anything else -- neither fast offerings nor temples nor missionary work -- even though all of those things have meaning for me. I can't justify giving them any more. Even if they start spending the money and distributing it, that is a huge backlog.

They will still get my vote for breaking up what they have, apparently in about three weeks.

Talking about money

I am going to do something very gauche now, and write candidly - with specific amounts - about money.

Yes, that is very taboo, but that is the kind of thing that allows inequality to continue. Your boss not wanting you and your coworkers to discuss salary may be to keep people who could reasonably earn more from knowing it, but it doesn't have to be that way at church.

Before my 2008 job loss I felt like I was doing pretty well financially. I had sort of noticed the cost of living going up, though I may have been in some denial about it. Anyway, I was grossing $800 a week, and I paid tithing on the gross: $80 per week.

See, that's something you are not usually supposed to come right out and say. When I first started having a pay check from which taxes were withheld, that felt right, so that's what I did. At times I would think that if I paid on the net income, it would then follow that I would pay tithing on any tax refund I received. I never switched to paying on the net, but I usually made a contribution from my refund too.

I have a tendency toward generosity anyway, being a soft touch for many things. It always worked out. Even when things have been terrible, I have still found ways to give, sometimes possibly more than was prudent but that still felt right.

We also talk about the importance of a generous fast offering, without getting specific about that.

I understand why we are reluctant to talk, but it can have value. I have heard good arguments for paying on net income. While it hasn't changed what feels right to me, I am glad to understand that my way is not the only way. Someone who pays on the net and has it working for them might feel bad if I say I pay on the gross, especially if I proclaim it the only right way, which I do not have the authority to do.

There is a lot of room for individual judgment in living the commandments. We go to tithing settlement, and the bishop only asks if you pay a full tithing. He doesn't ask whether that is net or gross, or eye the slip to multiply by ten and see if that is likely to match your income. That's a good thing.

(There may be some bishops who do, or who ask you more than the "yes" or "no" questions, but they are probably overreaching and may be abusing power, even with good intentions.)

Similarly, if we compare fast offering amounts, and I pay much more than you, you might feel bad. This could be ridiculous, especially if I make much more money than you, or have fewer expenses, or a variety of other reasons.

At the same time, there is sometimes relief in knowing how someone else does it. That shouldn't then become an undue influence, and it can, so I have some trepidation as I write this.

Anyway, at some point between the ages of 18 and 36, my fast offerings went from $5 to $10 and $20 and $40, until by 2008 I was paying a $140 fast offering, monthly, where my monthly tithing was $320. I sometimes contributed to other things like missionary or temple funds too, but that's what I was giving, and it felt right.

Seriously, it felt like I needed to. It felt like I needed to see what I was capable of giving, and what faith I was capable of showing. I felt like I was being given a challenge and answering it.

That was between me and God. I don't recommend those amounts for anyone else. I can recommend trying to find what is a good amount for you, but that is highly individual, and it should be.

In September of 2008, I went to Australia and New Zealand for a month. My bosses lied to me outright about many things, so that when I came back I not only had no job but was ineligible for unemployment. That's the second time I had a crooked boss work things out that way, but the world economy didn't crash the first time. It was rough.

I then received a lot of help from church funds. I had been helped once before in college, and members paid most of my mission costs (I think it cost $350 per month at the time, and I had enough saved up to pay $50 per month). I have gotten help with a few things since during these past four years of unemployment, though not as much as you might think. (I have some stories there, but I don't know if I will tell them.)

I have learned a few lessons along the way. Being a good person and paying your tithing does not prevent financial hardship, but it does bless you. It would have been really easy for me to not be able to afford college, a mission, trips we have taken, and even some medical bills, but things worked out.

Things have often been precarious while I have been caring for my mother, but we still have a roof over our heads, clothes on our back, and food on our table. That is composed of many miracles and blessings.

I have learned that sometimes you are the giver and sometimes you need to receive. Frankly, I still have a hard time with that one. I learned it mentally, but I am not quite there on not minding emotionally. It is pride, but not only pride, and I know a lot people who read this will get it completely. Especially now when the Church is really doubling down on self-reliance, it is easy to feel like a failure when you need help. I still ultimately know that I have worked hard and done many good things.

I am writing all of this now because of something that I have been trying to write since December, when the story broke about the Church's $100 billion dollar investment fund.

That's a long time to stall, but I feel now like I needed to get out my story of tithes and offerings first. I have been such a true believer. I have thought deeply about these things, and had faith increased. Some things have changed and some haven't, but the things that have changed have been a source of grief.

I hope now that I am ready to express myself on that.