This series is focusing (if somewhat circumspectly) on the harm caused by gender dogma. I realize that it may be hard for some people to give that up, because it feels so essential and right: men are supposed to be strong and women are supposed to be soft and we totally respect both of them but they are eternally different and YOU CAN'T CHANGE IT!
To which I pose this question: is it women or men who are supposed to pattern themselves on the Savior?
Are men not supposed to be compassionate? Are women not supposed to have integrity? Are any of us supposed to be cowardly or prideful?
I don't see a strong scriptural basis for gender differences. There is definitely representation of existing cultural traditions, but if the best you can offer for proof is the Pauline Epistles (which I read, but I take some of it with more than a grain of salt) you are not making a convincing case.
I have referenced racial prejudice before for comparison; let's remember that people - including church leaders - accepted the prevailing beliefs of the time, even though we know it was wrong now. Part of their ability to do so related to the deep roots of those prevailing beliefs. There is a structure that is accepted, and there is social conditioning that reinforces the structure.
Looking at the gender structure for our day, sometimes that results in women judging other women and being catty to them. This is a way of exerting dominance in a culture where the men have dominance, and it totally isn't ladylike to exert physical dominance anyway, so all you have is gossip and insinuation. That happens, we all know people who were very successful at that and people who were hurt by it, but is it Christ-like? Absolutely not. Not even when the gossip and insinuation is about sluttiness which makes it seem like a Christian concern. It is a terrible thing to do, and should not be done.
What is the point of Christianity if it leaves us sniping at each other and contending for power? What is the point if we look at the world through the exact same eyes as those who don't believe in him?
Think about the belief that men are naturally bigger and stronger. There are averages, but think of the tall women and short men, the women who are more physically powerful and the men less - sometimes through working out or not, but genetics plays a role - and is there a problem with that variety?
There is a similar natural variation of temperaments and inclinations. Foolishly labeling specific traits as masculine or feminine primarily serves to make a lot of people feel like there is something wrong with them. Again, if you want to be sniping and grasping for power, that is a helpful system, but that is not for followers of Christ.
Perhaps most important point here is that we don't get there automatically when the structure is so pervasive. Even regular scripture reading and church attendance will not get you there. Those beliefs need to be ruthlessly examined and evaluated against those things that we truly know to be important rather than simply customary.
My circumspection is not so much a fear of offending; some days there is so much crap out there I want to offend people, though I would still question its usefulness. However, the real reason I drag things out slowly, taking a long time to make a point, is that hope that the quiet chipping away will do the work better. That if enough stories and verses and points get out there, it will be self-evident before I say it.
But let me make one more point back on that original question: who is supposed to try and be like Christ?
From Matthew 23:37... "How often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not!"
That is feminine imagery, and Jesus was not afraid or uncomfortable to apply it to himself. If his tenderness is feminine, then all men should be feminine, but maybe it is just better to quit obsessing over gender.
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