Preparing for death, part 5

I could also have called this preparing for life, I suppose.

The prospect of death will feel worse if life has not been satisfactory. The dissatisfaction could come from a feeling that life wasn't meaningful, but it could also come from a lack of enjoyment. The deathbed regret of spending too much time at the office could go either way. The popularity of bucket lists is an attempt to address some of this, but I think misses the point.

One problem with the bucket list concept for me is this idea of checking off items and then you are ready to die. It is more productive to focus on what constitutes a happy life. If you had an amazing week in Paris, but afforded it by working two jobs so you were always tired and never saw your friends, the happiness may not balance out right. Then, if the week in Paris ends up not being amazing, it's even worse.

This could be a launching point for a discussion on economics and income inequality, but that will happen on the main blog later on. Instead, I am going to make two other points.

One kind of glib answer for last week's post on spiritually preparing for death is temple work. Yes, that was in the post last week as a way of being prepared to meet God, but it can also work as a way of having people on the other side who will be glad to meet you. Serving them is one way of knowing that your life had meaning.

It is kind of glib because you can do that without feeling it, like you can do lots of service and obedient things without feeling it. Therefore, the first point is mindfulness. Think about what you are doing. Ponder the significance, empathize with the others involved, and be aware of what is happening.

Mindfulness in life is what can help you to see that your life is lonely, but that you can make a point of spending time with friends; or that life is too hectic, but you are wasting time on trivial things. Finding the areas where you can make your daily life better is more valuable than seeing the Grand Canyon, and I say that as someone who wants to see the Grand Canyon and intends to do so.

The other point is a simple reminder that it's okay for us to rest, relax, and enjoy recreation.

It seems simple, but it is easy to feel guilty for not using every minute effectively. I have certain television shows that I have decided to watch, and I record them and watch them when it is convenient. I will also sometimes just sit and watch Family Feud re-runs. That would not be a great use of time, but if I have been doing some heavy reading, my brain needs a rest.

People who would read posts about preparing for death are probably not likely to be really hedonistic, but they might go to far the other way, forgetting that fun is not only permissible, but necessary. Too much of that can bring on a breakdown.

The breakdown could lead to the devolution into utter hedonism, and it might only be temporary, but it's better to just take care of yourself now. Do wise things and important things, but do fun things and relaxing things too. Both are needful.