You say you want a resolution

It's getting to be time for New Year's resolutions again.

I have thought about various recommendations I could make, applying my years of studying emergency preparedness to how the future might look when you have a chaotic evil administration coming into power. 

(Yes, their level of chaos may very well mean that infighting will knock out some of them before they have a chance to do much damage. There are so many of them -- and so bent on destruction and exploitation -- that even if Vivek and Elon end up out before they are in, the larger problem remains.)

I could give you ideas, but some of them will be beyond your power. Some of them may sound counterproductive. There is also the chance that some of them might be perfectly reasonable for another person and not be good for you.

The point is then to choose things that are right for you. We don't judge other people for not being able to do some things. We are kind to ourselves about our abilities at this time, knowing times will change.

We know that there are worldly standards that can be not merely impractical but actually destructive.

We know that we can get guidance and inspiration.

My biggest ticket item would be to get solar panels. More specifically, it would be getting them with a battery backup system instead of being solely tied to the grid. That way it would not just be a way of saving money on ever-rising utility costs and attempting to be kinder to the environment, but also a way of not having to worry about power outages. 

It is the biggest-ticket item because not only would it involve the panel installation, but for practical purposes our electrical would have to be rewired (really already a need) and the roof would have to be replaced (not quite already a need, but getting closer). That all is just not in my power at this time.

If it is something you could do, well, it might be a good thing to do.

Here is a counterintuitive one that does not apply to me at all: stop living with people who don't even like or respect you.

After the election, a lawyer commented about suddenly a lot of women coming in and filing for divorce. November is usually a slow time of year for that, but the numbers were exceeding the more normally busy times of year.

On a similar note, gynecologists are swamped right now, with a lot of people requesting more permanent forms of birth control (including sterilization) and trying to get it done before the inauguration. They are worried that they won't be able to do it at all, or be able to deal with what may happen after.

I am sure it is the same type of concern that is leading to the divorce filings, but I am equally sure that there had been growing unhappiness.

I remember at one time thinking about how we need to teach young women better about what to look for before deciding whom to marry. That was still thinking that making a good choice and then being good to each other would be enough. I had not counted on the recent influences where there are men who are becoming much worse about showing any respect or affection for women or gratitude for what their partners do.

That would be a hard realization, and it could be even harder to realize that it will not be fixed by your efforts. 

So am I advocating for divorce? Maybe. If talking or therapy or anything like that work, great. It would be better to improve a relationship than to lose it. 

That being said, I don't need the grinding demoralization that would come with living with someone who is actively growing to hate you. Then, sometimes part of their continued worsening is becoming violent. That is not something that is helped by staying for the sake of the children.

Individual circumstances vary greatly, but that might be something both needed and hard.

Finally, one of the most popular resolutions for a new year is to start working out.

Well, it's not really working out so much as losing weight, and I have already written about that.

https://preparedspork.blogspot.com/2023/02/the-weight.html

Those issues are important, because it is the way health is perceived to be tied to weight that makes this a perilous goal. 

I feel like it would be a good idea to become stronger and build stamina. Exercising should be a reasonable path toward that.

Someone who has struggled with an eating disorder might have the same desire, but find that trying to achieve goals that are related to fitness, and set with fitness in mind, still find their disordered eating coming back.

Is this a helpful post at all? Ummmm...

Life is hard, and probably going to get harder. We can do a lot to make it easier for each other. We should still strive to improve. We need to be realistic. Sometimes there is value in trying and failing.

Let's all be kind.

Ultimately, all of these goals are about trying for something better. Kindness is a good path toward that.