My Talk: Gratitude

Last week I mentioned submitting names to the temple. 

The collected efforts of my grandmother and the two cousins meant that when I was assigned a family tree in junior high, I could do a really good one. In the process of doing that, I also noticed that not many ordinances had been done. That was the first time I submitted names to the temple.

The next round of submission happened when two other cousins, inspired by cousin Marguerite, created a book of the descendants of our great-great-great grandparents. In fact, their son was the one great-great grandparent I had left out in the junior high batch, because that family was so complicated. Another cousin lent me the book, and even though I was a busy college student I spent hours uploading the information and submitting names.

That cousin later dropped about 1000 Bobier names on me. Other cousins would emerge from the woodwork at times, filling in blanks. None were members of the church, so they were not going to submit the names to the temple. The appearance of those names to me felt like there was family knocking from the other side of the veil, telling me it was their time.

I was grateful to be an instrument for that purpose, but also grateful for the others who helped. I could not have done so much without their help. 

As I was thinking about how the work of the Utah pioneers prepared things for current members of the church, I again had to acknowledge that their are other legacies. We all have people who have gone before. 

Sometimes that is family. Although my father did not stay in the church, it was his joining in the first place that led to my being here today. I know it is possible to join the church later in life, but I am grateful for being born in it, and the head start that gave me.

As I learn more about economics and generational wealth, it has become very clear to me that we would not have a house if my father had not been able to get a loan through the VA, which he was able to do because of his time in the army, and being able to do so at a time when housing was more affordable. My buying the house was my own decision, but it being available for us is not something that I could have controlled.

Even with that, there is more to the story. The house hunting had been very discouraging, and he was giving up. Our mother began looking. Her requirements were a four bedrooms and a fenced yard. Our family had recently grown from 5 to 7 with the birth of my sisters, and as they were starting to tear around more, a fence to contain them was absolutely necessary.

The first agent Mom spoke to - a man - told her that there was no way that she would find what she wanted in her budget. Mom found a woman agent to help her, and the house was found right away.

That gives us not just a roof over our heads and the ability to keep pets -- which is absolutely necessary for my happiness -- but also connections. There are people in this word whom I have known since I was six, and in this stake some who have been in my family's life since before I was born. I like having those roots.

To be here, I needed not just my job at the time (which came through a combination of prior work experience and church connections), but also my father's military service, my mother's persistence, and a helpful realtor who was not an arrogant chauvinist.

One of the greatest blessings in my life has been the public library system. There have been countless people contributing to that for decades. Some of them are well known names, like Benjamin Franklin and Andrew Carnegie. Many lesser known people contributed. Locally a big part of strengthening the Aloha community was Eric Squires, and our parents socialized.

That does not even count all of the people who have contributed to public education, which was so important to me.

For those things, they did not have me in mind, but they did have an eye toward benefiting others and they worked toward that.

Family history may show us that we are related, and the gospel lets us know that in a spiritual sense, but there are other connections, and there are ways in which we help and harm each other.

It is easy to assume that everything that we do is because we are good and smart and competent.

I hope we are all of those things, but we still do not work in a vacuum. Not knowing that can lead to judging others, and pride, and those will kill the spirit.

It also leads away from a sense of gratitude, and awe in the way things can work out. 

Those are wonderful things to have.