Christmas Gifts: The Temple

I remember once saying that I did not so much like going to the temple as having gone to the temple. 

It is a significant time investment. When you don't have enough time, you feel that. I don't dislike being there, but at least for me it is more about what is accomplished there than the experience of accomplishing it.

I still believe in the importance of that work with my whole heart.

All four of my grandparents were dead before I was born, but I have felt that pull to them and the generations beyond them.

I submitted my first names to the temple when I was in junior high, and I think another two batches before I was out of college. 

When I say I felt a "pull"... it was not just that I could feel caring about them, but I have felt them reaching out to me, asking for their work done. When I would remember things, or I would suddenly get more names from a relative outside of the church -- sometimes ones I had never even known existed -- then I knew that they wanted their work done, and they were providing a way.

I could never not believe that those ordinances are true and important.

In the temple, I have felt that whatever my life was lacking, what I did there had value, and that it was enough.

In the temple, I have felt a happiness that was not my own, but it made me happy to feel their happiness.

I have felt reassurances there, and seen that I was remembered. 

When I was younger, it seemed like I could never go to the temple without finding someone I knew there. That doesn't happen so much now, but it is still a place of connection. 

This is a short one, so I will add one other thought. 

I have said that currently I am reading old conference talks. I just finished April 1990.

I never watched conference then, though I read the church magazines somewhat reliably. That changed shortly after I graduated from high school in June of 1990. Going to a singles ward and going off to college got me more diligent, apparently. I remember loving all of the leaders and knowing the names and faces of the First Presidency and the apostles by the time I was on my mission.

Approaching the October 1990 conference (and seeing some things that aren't so great along the way), I have been wondering how these talks that I know I watched and felt good about will feel. There has been some trepidation.

Then I remembered that I grew to appreciate Brigham Young more after coming to terms with him being racist. 

We have to let people have their imperfections.

It will be okay.