All coming back

The direction we have been going with these last few posts is getting at a balance between loving and thinking.

It should be obvious to anyone reading a religious blog that we should love each other and want to help each other. 

It may not be as obvious that we can have good intentions and miss pressing needs, and even unintentionally cause harm.

I'm going to tell two more stories centered around celebrities in the hopes that they will be illustrative, even if there are more pressing matters.

Actor Danny Masterson was recently convicted of drugging and raping two women. 

I believe I had heard of a third woman, but it is a pretty safe bet in cases of rape and sexual assault and similar things that whether we are talking about convictions or accusations, that number is low.

Several fellow actors wrote letters of support to the judge in Masterson's case, trying to argue for a more lenient sentence. Among them were Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis:

https://theconversation.com/hollywood-letters-of-support-for-danny-masterson-demonstrate-the-pervasiveness-of-myths-about-rape-culture-213508

The photo that accompanies the article is from their apology letter as they gave into the backlash. 

There were several gross things about their support. For example, they called Masterson an anti-drug role model, ignoring the irony of Masterson drugging his victims. 

In this case, the bigger issues were probably their vocal support of #MeToo and Kutcher's chairman role in Thorn, a purportedly anti-child sex abuse company. He has since stepped down.

Their mistake is really one that's as old as the hills: this person is nice to me, and my friend, and so I will defend them.Obviously their treatment of me makes them a good person!

Except that's not how it works.

I had thought this would be about the tendency to side with those more powerful, but this particular story does seem to be more about personal relationships. Famous people get to know other famous people, but their world may not be especially relevant for our world.

There was a different aspect that struck me, partly because of the other story.

Despite their past association, there had not been much buzz about the Kutchers through the original allegations against Masterson all the way through the conviction. Then, once it came out that they had supported lenience, that started a lot of conversation.

Things that were pointed out:

• Masterson exerted a powerful influence on the set of That 70s Show, largely focused on excluding Topher Grace (who left the cast early, despite being the star, and whose wife posted a statement apparently in favor of the victims).
• Thorn has apparently done more to endanger sex workers than make children safer.
• Kutcher first kissed Kunis when she was 14 and he was 19, on that set. He has also made inappropriate statements about other younger actresses, like a 15 year old at the time Hilary Duff.

It may not have been a set where you would even expect to find safety and respect.

Sometimes we talk about all watching everyone's lives on a big screen at Judgement Day, which sounds remarkably boring. However, I do believe that in addition to our own inescapable awareness of our own lives, good and bad choices both, I also believe we will certainly understand what affected us, in good and bad ways.

The things that were brought up about Ashton Kutcher reminded me of that. I don't know that he intended harm, but he did not try hard enough or care enough to do good. That is a pretty important failure.

That reminds me of the other story:

https://www.esquire.com/entertainment/tv/a45080988/martin-short-comedians-reactions-social-media/ 

A writer wrote a scathing piece about Martin Short, calling is desperately unfunny and annoying. Fans, comedians and Canadians rushed to Short's defense, lauding not only how funny he was (and posting clips to prove it) but also how kind and wonderful he was. Apparently, only one person had anything bad to say about Martin Short, which made it foolish of them to publish it.

Of course, if they were writing about something correct -- even if the rest of the world were wrong -- it would be important to tell that truth, but just being petty can cost you.

Justice is not instant. It's not even particularly fast most of the time. 

However, the deeds that we do and the words that we say have effects. If that seems like I am leaving out thoughts, well, those thoughts are going to create the words and deeds.

So let us work to be informed. Let us work to be kind. 

Let us be valiant.

Then when all deception is gone -- including self-deception -- we will be able to feel good.